Alicia White Photography – Charlotte Wedding Photographer

It’s a rainy day around these parts. If you know me, you know that I really enjoy a good rainy day indoors. I feel all sorts of productive and relaxed as I hear the pitter-patter of rain against our roof. Speaking of rain, that means Spring is in the air! Eric and I purchased our very own (first) HOUSE and moved in late January (YaY!) I’ve been waiting till the tree in front of our house blooms to post some images (promise these are coming soon!) Sometimes I look around and it’s still surreal that the house is ours (love it so much!) Growing up, the walls in our house were kept pristine white and my parents used artwork and wall hangings as decoration. Having lived in dorms and apartments for the past seven years, I’ve never had the chance to paint nor even think about wall colors or decorating with paint to enhance a room. As some of you homeowners know, it’s easier to paint before the furniture gets all moved in and settled into their places. When we first closed on the house, I feel like I had to choose all the paint colors for the WHOLE house in a matter of days (literally) – and WOW was that overwhelming. Eric watched as the paint samples continued to line up on the counter and I had a notebook of about 50 “maybe” colors I HAD to look into. I read forums, I “studied” pinterest, and I had meetings with the workers at Benjamin Moore who I think thought I was crazy. Eric still laughs as all the paint colors I randomly picked out are in the “grey” family. Who would have known that grey can come in SO many shades? I just love how cozy it’s starting to make everything feel!

We are pretty much ALMOST done painting the downstairs (still have the awful fire engine red bathroom to do!) and Eric did an amazing job on the upstairs loft area. Painting gets tiring and we quickly learned that it’s a lot of time, energy, and financial cost to paint every single room in the house right away. I started to become frustrated with feeling like we were slowing down on our progress and felt like we needed to paint, decorate, and FILL the rooms with furniture (we don’t presently own) to make them “complete” and feel like HOME. See, I was afraid it “wouldn’t feel like home” with rooms that still had boxes or the awful “baseball” wallpaper that blinds me when I walk into one of the guest rooms. Things started to get really stressful and I was starting to not enjoy having so many options. We realized we needed to slow down and give ourselves a break – it doesn’t HAVE to happen overnight. This Date Night Thursday post is about slowing down, enjoying the process, and realizing that some things in life just take their time. There is NO rush. And you know what? I’m starting to realize that I like taking my time on this type of project. I don’t want to quickly pick out a paint color for our bedroom “just to get it done”.  Day by day we empty a box and things find their place. We have a roof over our heads and are SO thankful and blessed for the opportunity to even have this home. I’m shoving the perfectionist side of me away, and enjoying the process as much as I will the end result. Just as in life, it’s not about the destination but the journey. Plus I’m enjoying getting to spend some extra time with the husband as we do the house projects together as a family.  It hasn’t been easy, but I think the best things and moments in life never are. So for now, I’ll pass by the boxes and random clutter in the dining room, I’ll wake up every morning and stare at our bedroom wall full of paint samples, and I’ll continue to scour the internet for ideas and read home decorating books as I start to fill our walls with art and memories.

 And I’m ok with that.

 Because home is where the heart is, and I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.

Come visit us! 

Today’s post is a doozy, but one that I think needs to be read. As I mentioned, I’m part of a weekly bible study with an amazing group of girls. We are reading, “What’s It Like To Be Married To Me”. Each chapter delves into a different area of marriage/relationships, and this past week the reading and our conversation really impacted me. On my way home Tuesday night it struck close to my heart that this MUST be the topic that I write about for this weeks post.

Life has a “tricky” way of becoming overwhelming fast. During the last few minutes of a Yoga class I attend, I feel this total peace within my life and soul. Of course, as soon as I start driving back home, reality hits as someone cuts me off or I am rushing to the next appointment. Lets face it, there is a lot of stress that happens (often on a daily basis!) to gripe and complain about. The reality is, the more we continue this cycle/pattern, the more it BECOMES us. It becomes who we are and our thinking patterns. Are you one of those wives/girlfriends who as soon as your significant other walks in the door you just pour out all the hashes of the day? I’ve been there. Sure it “seems” like a nice release, but when we start constantly thinking and acting in this way, it becomes part of HOW we start to think and then turns into how we act and react.

This also pertains to our complaints about others. I love marriage; it’s such a beautiful gift. When you put two people in a household, you are of course going to have your differences in how you do things. Often, someone has to be “right” in their method of doing things. In turn you start to nag and complain, and start to really take your loved one for granted (especially if after awhile, all you see is the negative).  So, why not choose joy instead? Why not choose the now to thank your significant other for all they bring to your life. Yes, we all have our gripes, and I think I’ve ACTUALLY told my husband “why can’t you speak to me in sonnets like Edward does to Bella” – but you know what? I love him for all the little things he does because he loves me. Giving me a kiss on the forehead EVERY morning before he leaves for work. Like cleaning out my car on his Saturday off as a surprise and even putting a “new car” scent smelly in there because he knows I love good smells. And how about rushing home during a busy workday to help me bring Henry to the vet when his paw was torn up from stepping on glass. The list can go on and on; but the fact of the matter is that he loves me unconditionally has his wife and best friend, and I need to show more gratitude on a DAILY basis. Don’t wait until a bad thing happens in your life to start being grateful or saying thank you. We must take a stand to “Choose Joy” TODAY and remember all the beauty and blessings we have right in front of us. I’m not saying this is going to be an easy thing. No, it’s not. So even if the toddler is getting into mischief or you’re up to your neck drowning in taxes, find the silver lining and choose joy. Because this to shall pass, and wouldn’t you much rather be a person that exudes positivity? Think of what it can bring to your relationship if instead you chose to thank your partner for just being him than complaining about something he forgot to do. It definitely will be a struggle at times, but I promise the effort will not go unnoticed and your relationship will strengthen.

So for this Date Night Thursday, I ask that you write down a few things that your spouse/significant other did for you this week. It doesn’t have to be GRAND gestures. It can be as simple as “cleaning out the dishwasher” or “making dinner”. Find some quiet snuggle time and THANK each other for one (or a few of) those things you were thankful for that might have gone unspoken this week. I know of couples that make this a weekly occurrence or keep a “thankful” journal. When at any point you’re feeling that life is bringing you down, or you’re upset with your partner, take out the journal and read past entries. Take the time and effort to learn the language of gratitude.

A special thank you to the adorable Rachel-May. We talked in depth about this topic together and it was she who inspired the branded “choose joy” image above. Check out her work!